Cheney now just going around demanding retroactive immunity

More fodder for my application to The Onion.

White House officials are expressing concern over Vice President Dick Cheney's recent behavior, specifically his growing number of apparently haphazard calls for retroactive immunity.

On Wednesday, Cheney once again called on Congress to pass a new FISA bill that includes retroactive immunity for telecommunications companies that violated the privacy rights of American citizens by participating in the Bush administration's warrantless wiretapping program. It's a demand Cheney has made many times over the last several months.

"Those companies that may have helped us may have done so specifically at our request, and they may have done yeoman duty for the country," Cheney said in a speech to the American Enterprise Institue. "They are possible partriots. They may even be true American heroes.

"We all may owe these companies a tremendous debt of gratitude," he added.

Last week, in an interview on Fox News, Cheney called for retroactive immunity for Karl Rove, claiming that that Rove has broken no laws but that immunity for the former White House chief of staff is "of the utmost importance."

In addition, over the past several weeks, Cheney has demanded immunity for his wife Lynne, his gardner, the wait staff at The Willard Room restaurant and for his Fellowes C-380C Powershred document shredder.

"Dick is demanding immunity for just about everybody he has come into contact with over the last seven years," said a White House official on the condition of anonymity. "Some of the staff think he's crazy. Personally, I think he'd be crazy if he weren't doing it.

"I mean, let's face it..." the official said, his voice trailing off.